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Trakehner
04-10-03, 02:28 PM
THought I would share this rather cute poem. Anyone else got some beauties?Sung to the tune of Janis Joplin's "Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz"


Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horsy that bends
My friends all ride warmbloods
I must make amends.
I practice my leg yields
Each evening 'til ten

Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horsy that bends.


Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse that won't buck
I'm tired of trying
To land standing up
I spend all my time
Brushing dirt off my butt


Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse that won't buck



Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse that won't bite
I count all my fingers
And toes every night
I feel like a carrot
When I'm in his sight

So oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse that won't bite.


Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse that stays clean
I brush him, I groom him,
I've considered chlorine
His color's too chestnut
For a horse with gray genes

Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse that stays clean.


Oh Lord, won't you buy me
A horse with some guts
This spooking and shying
is driving me nuts
And while You are at it
Make me less of a klutz

Oh Lord, won't you buy me
a horse with some guts


Oh Lord, won't you give him
some hindquarter drive
This horse is sooo lazy
not sure he's alive
We bend and we circle
'till way, way past five

Oh Lord, won't you give him
some hindquarter drive

Trakehner
04-10-03, 02:36 PM
Let Me Teach You -A touching Equine Poem
When you are tense, let me teach you to relax.

When you are short tempered,
let me teach you to be patient.


When you are short sighted,
let me teach you to see.


When you are quick to react,
let me teach you to be thoughtful.


When you are angry,
let me teach you to be serene.


When you feel superior,
let me teach you to be respectful.


When you are self absorbed,
let me teach you to think of greater things.


When you are arrogant,
et me teach you humility.


When you are lonely,
let me be your companion.


When you are tired,
let me carry the load.


When you need to learn,
let me teach you.


After all, I am your horse.


And now, the REAL story........


When you are tense,
let me teach you that there are lions in the woods,
and we need to leave NOW.


When you are short tempered,
let me teach you how to slog around
the pasture for an hour before you can catch me.


When you are short sighted, l
et me teach you to figure out where,
exactly, in 40 acres I am hiding.


When you are quick to react
let me teach you that herbivore's kick
MUCH faster than omnivores.


When you are angry,
let me teach you how well I can
stand on my hind feet, because I don't FEEL
like cantering on my right lead today, that's why.


When you are worried,
let me entertain you with my mystery lameness,
GI complaint, and skin disease.


When you feel superior,
let me teach you that, mostly,
you are the maid service.


When you are self-absorbed
let me teach you to PAY ATTENTION.
I TOLD you about those lions in the woods.


When you are arrogant,
let me teach you what 800 lbs of
YAHOO-let's-go distance horse
can do when suitably inspired.


When you are lonely,
let me be your companion.
Let's do lunch. Also, breakfast and dinner.


When you are tired,
don't forget the 1000 lbs of
hay that needs to be unloaded.


When you are feeling financially secure,
let me teach you the meaning of
"Veterinary Services, additional".


When you need to learn,
hang around, bud. I'll learn ya.

jezzie
05-10-03, 10:29 AM
heres a couple but they're not that good...

Now the great winds shorewards blow; Now the salt tides seawards flow; Now the wild white horses play. Champ and Chafe and toss in the spray

A little neglect may breed mischeif ... for want of a nail, the shoe was lost; for want of the shoe the horse was lost; and for want of a horse the rider was lost.

A hurry of hoofs in a village street,
A shape in the moonlight, a bulk in the dark,
And beneath, from the pebbles, in passing, a spark
Struck out from a steed flying fearless and fleet:
That was all! And yet, through the gloom and the light,
The fate of the nation was riding that night.

Come fill up my cup, come fill up my cann,
Come saddle my horses, and call up my man;
Come open your gates, and let me gae free,
I daurna stay longer in bonny Dundee.

Only a man harrowing clods
In a slow silent walk
With an old horse that stumbles and nods
Half asleep as they walk.

mumboj
05-10-03, 11:30 AM
Round-hoofed, short-jointed, fetlocks shag and long.

Broad chest, full eye, small head and nostril wide.

High crest, short ears, straight legs and passing strong.

Thin mane, thick tail, broad buttocks, tender hide.

Look, what a horse should have he did not lack,

Save a proud rider on so broad a back.

.............................................Willi am Shakespeare

I really love this - starts trotting, then canters off.